Four Killer and a Baby
by Enna Namo
Summary: The title is selfexplaining
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I own neither Weiß Kreuz nor the rights on the from me adored French movie: Three men and a Baby. And I don't want the American version anyway. However, I don't make any money with my writing.  
  
Author's Notes: It just came over me. I have read so many WK-fics that were sad and dramatic, that I just couldn't take it anymore. I had to write something funny.  
  
And this is also a thank you to my Beta-Reader Jana Deharde. She wished for a Youji/Aya pairing. And I distributed the addition to the family. *g*  
  
And this thank you is for Sapphire Angel of the Night. Come here Sapphire. (Sapphire slowly approaches on the stage and waves shyly to the audience.) This is Sapphire, she was so grateful to translate the German version of my story into English. (The audience claps hands and cheers her, Sapphire blushes.) Thus, if there are mistakes in spelling or grammar, blame her. (Enna Namo revives an patented Fuyimiya Aya Death glare from Sapphire.) Erm. Well, on with the story and don't forget to review.  
  
Four killer and a baby  
  
Good morning, Youji!  
  
"A day like any other," Aya mumbled annoyedly, while fetching the cut flowers from the cooling room and distributed them around the shop. Youji had as usual overheard or ignored his alarm clock as well as Aya's penetrating knocks. And now he stood alone in the shop and prepared himself for the first run.  
  
"The next time I'll drag him in by his hair. No matter, what the customers will say. He has the early shift and then I expect him, to be punctual."  
  
With a harsh movement he put the bucket with roses down, which he was carrying. Unfortunately the jerk was a tad too strong and a good deal of the water spilled on the floor. With a silent curse Aya left the shop shortly to fetch a rag. He was searching the broom cabinet for one when he heard the shop bell ring.  
  
"Good morning, I'll be right there!" he called out laud from the back to show possible clients, that he was there. Then he remembered something. "And if that's you, Youji. Was about time you got here! Get the remaining cut flowers out of the cooling room!"  
  
But surprisingly he didn't receive an answer and it remained silent in the shop. Aya frowned suspiciously and narrowed his eyes to slits. A customer would have at least replied to his greeting and Youji wasn't very likely to follow his orders without protest. Something was fishy. The shop bell rang silently a second time. Obviously someone had left the shop again. Aya chewed on his lower lip nervously. Maybe the customer hadn't wanted to wait or ............. he had used the opportunity to steal a few flowers. At this thought Aya growled angrily and grabbed the next best "weapon" he could find. With a broom in hands he rushed back into the shop to give the supposedly thief a few lesson in honesty.  
  
But the shop was empty, just as expected. Aya gave the door a quick glance and noticed, that the tiny bell was still swinging. So the thief couldn't be too far away. As fast as he could he rounded the counter with the register on it and ran towards the door to follow the thief. Unfortunately he had forgotten, that there was a puddle of water in the middle of the shop, that was waiting to be cleaned up. And unfortunately he as also too wrapped up in his persecution complex to notice it in time. And unfortunately he was also too fast.  
  
It literally knocked him off his feet when he slipped. With a surprised yelp he fell onto the floor. At the same time he let go of his broom, which fell into the window and knocked a few arrangements and pots over. A creative line of curses came from him as he raised his head and slowly got up. And then suddenly he was looking at a pair of large, green eyes.  
  
Loud knocking; loud, angry knocking: loud, angry and annoying knocks and then a voice that was just as loud and angry and annoying calling his name repeatedly. Youji slowly surfaced from his alcohol drenched dreams and unsuccessfully tried to ignore the hammering in his head. He slowly opened his eyes and closed them instantly because the sun was shining right at his face. The knocking grew louder and the voice grew angrier. And the hammering in his head got worse as well. Slowly he managed to identify the voice as the one of his red-haired team mate. It took a few moments until he was also capable to understand the words.  
  
"Youji, open the door this instant. I need to talk you. Get up."  
  
Another knocking-solo followed that was interrupted abruptly. Aya was obviously talking to someone, only this time much more quietly. Youji moaned. A glance at the clock told him that it was short before nine o' clock and therewith definitely not his time. But the headache hindered him from returning to his dreamland. So he decided reluctantly to get up and get himself at least a few Tylenol. Slightly staggering he padded towards the door of his apartment and opened it. Then he remember that Aya was waiting for him on the other side of the door and braced himself for the speech about responsibility and punctuality, that was sure to come. With a sigh he opened the door and froze. Had his chin not been connected with the rest of his head, it would be hitting the floor now. And to his luck you can open your eyes only so far, else those would have joined his chin on the floor. To put it short: Youji was shocked speechless.  
  
Aya stood with a bundle on his arm in front of his door. This bundle moved slightly and two tiny arms came out of it. At the end of each of those arms there were tiny hands, how Youji realised fast and one of those had clawed itself into Aya's sweat shirt, while the other one had closed itself around Aya's finger and tried to pull just this very finger in the direction of a cute, tiny mouth. This cute, tiny mouth was part of a small, round face with large green eyes; a lovely stub nose; red cheeks with the most lovely ears, that a baby could have. Under a pink knitted cap a few blond strands of hair were showing, that curled in slightly at the ends.  
  
Youji swallowed hard and ran both of his hand through his sleep-tousled hair. Fascinated he watched how the baby grabbed Aya's index finger and pulled it towards it mouth persistently. Youji watched how Aya slowly gave in and his finger finally landed in the target area and a pair of lips closed around it. Gurgling satisfied, the baby began to suck on Aya's finger as if it were a comforter.  
  
"Err... Aya?"  
  
The red-head raised his head and for a brief moment Youji thought to have seen something like a happy smile on the young mans lips. But it vanished so fast, that he thought it was only his imagination. Because now the ice- cold eyes were fixed on him, that were so typical for Aya. Absolutely untypical was, that he still had a baby on his arm, that was chewing happily on his index finger. Youji coughed embarrassed.  
  
"Err, Aya. There's a baby on your arm."  
  
If looks could kill, the blonde playboy would have been stabbed, shot and strangulated, and therewith would have sunken to the ground pretty dead, in this very moment. Thankfully for him and everyone else who has the misfortune to have been given one of Aya's patented death glares, these cause nightmares at the worst and no remaining physical damage.  
  
"I know that."  
  
"Err.. and where do have that baby from?"  
  
"Someone left it for you."  
  
"Err... err... ahm..." Youji stuttered out confusedly, until he finally understood the full meaning of Aya's words.  
  
"Why for me? I know no one with a baby. That has to be a mistake. I know, it's April's fools day and you are playing a trick on me. Right? No, wrong. Aya would never play a trick on someone. And Aya would never take a baby on his arm and also he would never allow, that someone chewed away on his finger. Now I know what's going on. I'm dreaming. Yes right. I drank too much and this is a nightmare. And any moment now I'll wake up."  
  
Satisfied with his own genial conclusion Youji crossed his arms in front of his chest and grinned at Aya, smiling broadly. Aya starred back unfazed. After a while Youji became nervous and looked at the floor, because he noticed he had cold feet. When he noticed that he stood in the doorway of his apartment, clad in only his boxers, his nervousness grew. And Aya was still standing there in front of him with that baby on his arm. Slowly the playboy shook his head.  
  
"Err, no dream?"  
  
Aya nodded a confirmation.  
  
"No dream, Youji. You're awake and this baby is real as well."  
  
With a loud, painful moan the blonde killer grabbed his head and massaged his temples. The baby made soft, gleeful gurgling noises, that sounded a bit like laughter.  
  
"Hey, is this brat making fun of me already? Youth today. I'm going to tell your parents that, when I see them."  
  
Youji pushed his lower lip forwards in a pout. Aya on the other hand sighed annoyedly and slowly pulled his index finger away. The baby tried in vain to grab it's comforter-replacement. As it vanished altogether with the hand, the baby pushed it's lower lip forwards as well. Aya heaved the bundle in his arms upwards a little, then pushed it against Youji's chest, who grabbed the baby and held it now -rather clumsily, but securely- in his arms.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean Aya? What are you giving me the baby for? Take it back where you got it from. I bet it's parents are worried sick already!"  
  
Aya simply crossed his arms and starred at the older hard. As a sneaky smirk slowly spread on his face, a cold shudder ran down Youji's spine and back up again and silenced him. Then Aya pulled a note out of his pocket.  
  
"Dear Youji. This is your daughter Miriam. She is now half a year old. I can't take care of her at the moment, so it's your turn now. Love, Sarah Jane"  
  
Aya folded the note together and pushed it into the hand of the shock- frozen Youji. Then he turned and descended the stairs down into the shop.  
  
"You'd better get dressed and go shopping."  
  
Youji looked confusedly from the baby to Aya and back again. When he finally found his voice again, Aya had almost arrived downstairs. Youji stormed towards the parapet and yelled after him.  
  
"Why should I go shopping? And why my baby? I don't have a daughter. I always use condoms and only the best quality! This has to be a mistake. I don't know a Sarah Jane!"  
  
He yelled the last sentence so loud, that Aya turned around and looked up to him slightly annoyed.  
  
"But obviously she knows you. And if you are honest, you will notice that the baby does look a lot like you. And now get dressed. I give you the morning off, so you can go shopping for your daughter."  
  
"But what should I buy for her?"  
  
Youji ran after Aya, who rolled his eyes as the playboy finally stood in front of him, dressed in nothing else but his boxer shorts.  
  
"Oh come on, you know what a baby needs, don't you? Everyone knows that. Buy a few bottles and baby food and most of all diapers. And a baby crib wouldn't be bad either and few things clothes."  
  
Aya named a lot more and Youji turned paler and more nervous with ever detail. Finally he couldn't bear it anymore and pushed the baby back into Aya's arms violently. "You know what? Since you know so much about babies, why don't you go shopping and I take your shift in the shop over? Is that an offer? You even get my credit card and you can take my car. Just buy what you think is necessary. Okay? Thanks Aya, you're a real friend. I'll just get my card and then the two of you can go and have a nice morning on your own."  
  
As fast as possible Youji stormed back up to his room to give Aya no chance to protest. In absolute record time he got dressed and ready for work and stormed the stairs back down barely 15 minutes later. Aya was no longer there, so he went into the shop. There, he found him, sitting on a chair next to the register with the baby on his arm. A probing gaze hit Youji, as he laid his credit card and car keys down in front of Aya with an apologetic smile. "Here I am. Now you two can go. I'll take care of the shop. Have a lot of fun, you two."  
  
Aya didn't move but instead kept on fixating Youji with that unexplainable expression in his eyes. Finally he did stand up and slowly walked around the counter towards Youji.  
  
"Err, Aya. You forgot the card. Here, I'll put in your pocket."  
  
Aya avoided Youji's hands skilledly, who tried to give it his red-haired team mate a second time, unsuccessful.  
  
"Come on Aya... this isn't funny. Stop moving. I only want to give you my credit card. The way you act, one could think I was trying to touch you elsewhere!"  
  
A tender blush creeped over Aya's cheeks and for a moment, he looked embarrassed. Then he pulled himself up to his full height.  
  
"It's your daughter, Youji. Therewith it is your duty to take care of her."  
  
He tried to give Youji the baby, but he avoided Aya with the same amount of skill as he himself had avoided the credit card before. Youji raised both hands defensively.  
  
"Okay, okay. I won't go out for at least a month and I'll be on time for the early shift. Promised. No? Not enought? I'll do the dishes. Still not enough? Please Aya. I don't know a thing about babies. Can't you do it? I'll do whatever you want me to, but please leave alone with that baby!"  
  
It wouldn't have taken much more, to make Youji go on his knees in front of Aya, who shook his head angrily after a while.  
  
"What is your daughter supposed to think of you, Youji? You act as if she were a infectious disease."  
  
The blonde playboy looked at the ground ashamed. Against all expectations, his friends words had hit a spot.  
  
"I don't know. It's just, I can't get used to the thought of being a dad. I never thought about that. Alone the possibility to have children was so absurd for me. I guess I just panicked."  
  
He looked up and smiled emberassedly at his team mate. Aya's face scrunched up, but then he nodded understandingly.  
  
"And you really think she looks like me?"  
  
Aya grinned slightly and held the little girl on his arm, so Youji could look at her. He even pushed the little cap away to reveal a wild-locked blonde head. Youji's eyes wandered over the small face under him and slowly a loving smile crept on his face.  
  
"She's really cute... for a baby. She has my eyes and look at those loveable lips. That's mine as well. And that little snub nose. No, she has that one definitely from her mother." Youji looked up and smiled at Aya. "You are right. She looks like me. But I really don't know, what to do." He looked beggingly at his friend. "Please Aya. Help me. You seem to know a lot about babies."  
  
And to proof his despair, he DID kneel down and raised his hands imploringly. Aya at first growled annoyedly, but that quickly grew softer to a barely audible purring as the little girl on his arm began to whimper. Carefully he rocked her back and forth until she calmed down. The still kneeling Youji on the other hand received another Fuyimija death glare, under which he shrank together as if under the blow of a whip.  
  
"Alright. I will help you. But only this one time."  
  
Youji jumped up relievedly, dashed to the counter, grabbed the keys and held them out to Aya together with the credit card. But the read-head shook his head and smirked.  
  
"You come with us."  
  
There was a jingling sound as the keys hit the floor. Out of shock, the playboy had dropped them and was now staring at Aya open-mouthed.  
  
"But who looks after the shop?" he tried to argue.  
  
But this argument remained unheard. Aya simply nodded to him, to follow him and went towards the door. Dumbfounded Youji picked the keys up and followed him, his head dropping slightly.  
  
"Put the "Closed" sign in the door and don't forget to lock it. Miriam and I will be waiting for you in the garage."  
  
Youji sighed obediently and did as he was told. It couldn't get any worse now.  
  
Or could it?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Famous last words: If you know me, you know that it can always get worse. Muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. 


	2. Important note

Important note:  
  
I'll only post the first chapter on ffnet, because of NC17 and all that. You will find all of my other cahpters at www.mediaminer.org/fanfic  
  
Still under the same nickname: Enna Namo  
  
But don't worry, I'll give message when I update here on ffnet, too.  
  
Ich habe nur das erste Kapitel auf ffnet, wegen der ganzen NC17 Sache und so. Die restlichen Kapitel stehen auf www.mediaminer.org/fanfic  
  
Nach wie vor unter dem selben Namen: Enna Namo  
  
Aber keine Sorge, ich werde auf ffnet stets eine kurze Meldung hinterlassen, wenn ich was hochlade. 


End file.
